Cheers and Fears

As I walked out the door with Andy this morning, I hesitantly let go of his hand.  Just yesterday I was telling Dan how we had been practicing every morning with walking next to Mommy instead of holding my hand.  Every day I see mothers walking with their little ones, some as young as Katie, without the need to hold their hands.  I have a fear of Andy running off as he LOVES to run.  So for the last few weeks, I’ve been gradually letting go.  Sometimes as we get to the sidewalk and sometimes just as we get to the bus stop.  Today, I let go.  TOTALLY LET GO!  My heart was racing and my mind was screaming at me, but I just gritted my teeth and slowly walked beside my little BIG boy.  He stopped a few times and looked at me quizzically as if to say, “Are you SURE, Mom?”  It wasn’t perfect.  I did have to remind him to walk next to me.  I had to redirect a few times.  One time, I did panic and grabbed his arm as he began to run.  But overall, it was alright.  He stayed either next to or right behind me and then kissed me and told me, “I love you, too” as the bus driver put on his seat belt.  It may be a small victory, but for Andy it was HUGE.